Holley's Story

I had just turned 16 january 1st, i met this guy the same month, i fell so inlove with him, he made me feel special, we decided to take things further, we broke up on the 16th of february.. i was waiting for my "monthly time" to "flow in". . . one week passed, then 2.. i took my test and well you know the answer, i phoned him, he wouldn't talk.

i went and talked to his mom, she was ok with it, but she started trying to take control, saying she would adopted the baby as her own, then the baby's dad started saying he didn't want nothing to do with it, but yet he went and told EVERYONE in school and in his old school i was having his baby! his mother even had the nerve to ask me if i was sure that her son was the father, i was so mad but i stayed calm and told her i was positive. then she told me that she couldn't make him take care of it or be there for me because he was only 14, and i know if i would have done that to some girl at 14 or any age i would be there every step.

well i told my mom, and she wasn't happy, she said that i was doing this on my own, but the next day she took me to the doctor and we signed the papers for an abortion...the hardest thing in my life that i had to do, i was 8 weeks, and i grew fond of it being there, i even had the names picked out, for a girl it would have been Nakita Lynn, and for a boy Sebastien, and my best friends told me that they were "black names" but there is no "white/black" names...

anyways i got it done and i wasn't shook until the next day, then depression set in, i wanted to die, i wrote a suicide letter, and i was scared to be alone, that i would kill myself so one of my best-friends came over when i was alone, thanks to her i am alive, it still hurts, i got my abortion done March 27th, 2003 its been almost 5 months and still some days i lay and cry, i hate myself for letting my mothers threats get to me...

and when i went back to school, this guy philip came up to me and said "did you kill your baby yet" i just went to class and broke down! how someone could say that to someone who just had an abortion, i don't know. he tried to say he was sorry but i wasn't in the mood so i told him he better get away from me.

me and the baby's father got back together after it was all said and done, but he up and left me 4 days later, so they saying "if you love someone let them go, and if they come back, they are yours" is wrong.

and to all the girls out there, i feel your pain.

21 July 2003

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"The most practical thing in the world is common sense and common humanity."
— Nancy Astor